Monday, 6 March 2017

An open letter to Dearest Maa

You would always be awake when I would wake up. You would already have taken bath and would be preparing breakfast for me. In fact as far as my memory lane goes, it would always be you who would wake me up. I would groan, "Please just another five minutes, Maa", which would never seem to get over. But, you would bear with this stupid boy of yours and run after him no matter what.
You would then coax me into brushing my teeth and going to take bath. You always knew that I didn't like to brush my teeth every morning, but you simply had those red angry eyes, which were enough to get me doing whatever you said. Within the next fifteen minutes, I would be immaculate and bathed. But, in the meanwhile, you won't be sitting idle or taking rest.
In this short gap, you would already have ironed my uniform and packed my lunch for the school. You were always blazing fast when it came to my needs. You never said, "I don't feel well, so I won't be able to cook lunch today. Grab something to eat from the canteen." You simply placed me over every other thing on this entire planet. Even above Papa and yourself.
And, then you would feed me the breakfast with your own hands. I know that it must have been irritating at times when you had a number of household chores to address. But, you always managed to feed me anyways. Why? Because I won't eat otherwise. This imbecile did put you through a lot of trouble, but you never complained.
And, this was the story of every morning for over twelve years of my school life! That's a huge sacrifice you made to groom me and provide me everything I needed. In fact, not just one but it was a series of countless sacrifices.
You could have slept an extra hour every day. But you didn't. You could have invested all of that time to exercise or do yoga, which would all have helped you and boosted your health to significant degrees. But, you never even thought of it. You took the task of placing my needs above yours as a pleasure. And, it was this altruist investment of yours that built me so perfect, Maa!
And, what I mentioned above is just the morning routine which had become a daily ritual for years and years. You would run after me to complete the homework. You would push me out of the house when I won't turn off the television. You would then also drag me back to the home, when I wouldn't wish to return home from play and do my homework.
Thoughts about me had cluttered your life and your mind so virulently, that all you ever thought about was me. Did I eat the lunch? Did I drink the milk? If I didn't, then you would heat it up again so that your dearest "Jaya" ate only what is healthy and best for his body. Oh! And, how can I forget the times when I got sick.
Those were the moments when I saw the sides of you that I had never earlier been exposed to. You would cry for I was vomiting. You would sit next to me the entire time. You would mix the medicines in sugar water as I found it to be a horrid experience to consume allopathic medicines. You would feed me water, wash my vomit, and change my clothes and what not!
I was only a liability which was in toto dependent on you. And, you never made me regret or grouse over that dependence. You not only dedicated yourself to me and my development. But, you left everything else in the world that would have needed your attention if I need you at the same instance.
No doubt, I made you cry a lot. I didn't score well at times in the examinations. I lied to you when I was caught cheating in those examinations. I got angry on you for I was not able to cope up with the hormonal changes that puberty had hit me with. At times, I made you feel disgruntled and shame in public. And, I can go on and on and on with such examples when I brought tons of misery into your life.
But, you never accepted any of those to be miseries. Rather, you always said- "It’s just a phase of learning and it shall pass. And, once the phase passes, my son will learn those crucial lessons of life, shine and make me proud."
Maa, it was this belief in you which never shook. You believed in your son's abilities no matter. I know I have made you wait a lot to show that gratitude and love which you always deserved more than any other person in this entire world. But, today I acknowledge that I was an imbecile to do so.
Dearest Maa, you brought up a beautiful child and fed him with values and tenets of being tenacious, honest and a man of integrity. And, today I can tell you that your son is strong on all of those pillars. And, none of this would have been a reality had you not waited so long for me to be bloom into this beautiful form.

You are my moon and I am your star. No matter how many obstacles may try to hamper our connection, we are meant to share the same space and that is all what matters. If this star ever again moves farther from the moon, remember that belief that you have had in you to this very moment- "I will come back to you no matter what. And, every time I will make you proud."
-Jayant Shilanjan Mundhra